Toni Braxton and Autism
13 10 2006
Singer Toni Braxton opens up about her family life. Toni is married to Keri Lewis They have two sons Demin Cole, 4 1/2 & Diezel Ky, 3 1/2. Toni speaks out about her everday challenges of being a mother, and getting her son Diezel diagnosed with autism. Braxton had a hard time getting the doctors to diagnose her son, and feels the three year old could have been helped if the neurological disorder was spotted earlier. Toni is upset with the Doctors, stating "They dismissed me. I don't know if it would have made a difference or not to be diagnosed earlier, but they had a "wait and see" attitude. It makes me so angry because a mother knows when something is wrong with her child."
Dear Toni,
I’m so very sorry to hear of your sons recent diagnosis of autism.
Toni this is coming from one very proud parent of an AUTISTIC son. Toni my son started walking at seven months and his speech and motor skills were right on target and BOOM two weeks after his 1st B-day he became very ill. the doctor had no idea what was going on , but the long story is that he had 2 heart surgeries was put on dialysis and was in ICU for 30 days. We didn’t know what was going on the Doc. told us that it was not looking good and yeah, I heard them, but we knew there was a higher power and this was our test as parents to see just where our faith was and Toni, at that point I did not care. I went to my knees and said “Father just send him home with me”. We took our son home after living in the IC unit and they did not think we would .
Toni and after that I was able to take on anything we had to teach him to walk and his speech became delayed and them they said around the age of 4 that he was mildly autistic what a blow. After that news I started working with my son every day . He is doing great . He is in 1st grade now .Toni &; Keri be Strong for we are our little one biggest voice.
Love a MOM of an angel
Toni,
Saw you on The View. My heart goes out to you. I have a six year old with autism. He was dx at 5, but I knew at 3. We didn’t get services until we moved to CA from CT. Its been a struggle and I know you will find all the resources you need. Hope you have family around. My husband is in the military and I was alone with my son and his younger brother. They both have severe behavior issue and its amazing we made it this far. I wish you the best!
Michelle Gummerus~
Dear Toni,
I watched you on The View this morning, as I raced around my home doing my Mommy duties. I have a son with Down syndrome, who is now 10, and a typical son who is 12. I am a big advocate, not only for children with Down syndrome, but for all kids who face challenges. You did a great job, going on T.V. and sharing your experience! Wow girl!! I know it is hard, as I HAVE walked your walk….that one Mom/Dad were right in that it does get better, it does get easier, with time….what ever your challenges. The youngest years are the hardest, and yes, we parents work hard to help our kids. Do feel free to take good breaks from it all sometimes…take a break from the teaching, the books, the everything…and know it is ok to do so.
There are many good resources out there! Check out the books from a special needs publisher I adore…www.woodbinehouse.com
and see what they offer for reading and teaching, regarding Autism.
Bless you dear mom, and your hubby too. It will be OK….just go with the flow for awhile…learn new things…remember too,that your sweet son is still the sweet son you have always known….that has not really changed.
He is a boy first and formost, you son. Your attitude plays alot into how others tend to view/treat your son and the situation as a whole. I am very forgiving of those who don’t know the right things to say….I look for opportunities to teach them more about those folks in our community who live with challenges, and to definately look for the positive!
Blessings to you and your whole family Toni. Hugs……Kathy
Toni, I sobed as I watched you on the View yesterday. I can not imagine how I would feel if my child was diagnosed with Artism. However, this is a new day!. There are new medical research everyday. You are hurt and angry at this point in your life but look at the whole picture. You have a loving family who supports you; you have a big teddy bear of a man who sticks with you 100% of the way, You are fortunate to be able to afford the type of help he needs/will need. You were exposed to excellent information while on the view on yesterday. You child will make it through this strugle Toni. God knows your heart and he also knows your character. You are a child of God of God and has always stood on high grounds— being a virgin until marriage. Your oldest son will help a lot in making this not so dificult. Toni, dont be so hard on yourself as you still have to save the strength and enery for your family and both of your sons. I wish you luck and peace. God will watch over you and yorus. Take care and hug your boys daily and, tell them you love them.
I also have a son (age 2) with autism. Isaac also has epilepsy. As a mother with an autistic child, I can relate to your struggles. It was hard to get both diagnosis with Isaac……especially the autism. They all wanted to wait and see, or turn their heads as if nothing was going on. I’m glad I listened to my maternal instinct, even when they wouldn’t.
I wanted to thank you for your courage and your heartfelt outreach. My wife and I adopted three children with special needs and my wife Lisa has a PhD in austism from the University of Kanasas. I know you are contacted by thousands of individuals, however, if you would take the time to contact me I would love to help share the resources you have found with other parents. Our website is a clearing house for information for parents who have children with special needs at no charge.
I wanted to thank you again as a parent for all that you are doing on our childrens behalf.
Most Sincerely,
Scott Adams
Toni:
I watched the Larry King special last night on Autism and was touched. I am the extremely proud mother of an 8 year old boy with Autism. He was diagnosed at 2 & 1/2; so I am no stranger to the struggles. Our family fits into the upper middle class income bracket so we have recieved NO help from the government and have had to pay for all avenues on our own. It has been a struggle but I am proud to say that our son is flourishing, he is beautiful, emotional and loving. He is reading and writing and in the public school system.
I have been contacted by other parents of newly diagnosed children for support and direction and am always happy to help.
Stay strong, it is a challenge but it can be wonderful and beatuiful to see each newly developed skill your son will achieve!
All the best, Kandi
April 10,2007
Ms. Braxton,I saw you on the view and understand what you are experiencing as a parent with a child with Autism. I am a Special Ed. Assistant who work’s with children who have various disabilities and know what your going to face on the long run regarding your son’s education. I always tell parents that your battle has just started, if your determined and consistant, things will get better in the future.
Your next step is to see what schools have to offer as far as services for children with Special needs. I know this from experience as I have 3 children(now grown up) who have LD and found that the road to education is not an easy one.
First step is not to be angry and look at it as a gift that your child has. That is what was given to him by God. I know you have recieved many emails from people but mine is based on what lays ahead for your child’s future and that is a challenge you will face. I wish you and your son the best and my prayers are with you both.
John Martinez
Special Education, Life Skills for Special Children
Hi Toni!
This thing you have done, opend the door to your family and leting the world know about your son prove that you are very very strong.
I know that this is hard, but i also know that it helps other familys understanding autism!
My youngest child, Lucas 5 years, have autism.
I know that it was something that wasn´t right but I didn´t wanted to look into the problem at that time, when he was 1.
But I still went to a doctor and then he got his diagnos when he was 3.
Here in Sweden that is early so Im glad that he got the help he needs.
My son is my mistery, he puzzels me and every day I learn something from him about my self.
He dont speak, but he´s learning.
Thank you for telling the world.
Many hugs
From
Linda Elser
Skelleftea, Sweden
Toni, I recall when I seen you on the View,, My Heart went out to you for the fact I been there and I cried,, My Grandson lives with Autism he is 9 and I love him with All My Heart, I am so very please to say he has the Best Teacher and Teachers Aid. Be strong & God Bless!!! Awareness & Cure For Our Children!!!!
Hi Toni, I just watched Oprah and saw Holly Robinson Peet and Jenny McCarthy on her show. While searching for their sites found you. I just want to say I believe my child would have been diagnosed with Autism had we continued doing many of the things the Doctors wanted us to do. He had severe food/chemical, and I mean reacted to everything and after having his first shot developed a rash on chest (called eczema). That would later cover most of his body. The story goes on and on, I could and plan to write a book because it was an ordeal dealing with doctors, family, etc. I will tell you what has made the most difference for us: diet (clear out all common allergens (wheat especially, dairy, EAT a mostly vegetarian diet) and cranial sacral therapy. You can go onto the Upledger Institute website (search on google) and learn all about this therapy. Many traditional MD’s discount many therapies but we know that the traditional medical community has been taught to treat with drugs and that is probably the worst thing you can do, in my opinion. Then it takes a whole lot of love, patience, money, and time (time for the body to heal). Healing can take place when the right envirnoment is provided. But a body that has internal healing that needs to be done does not need processed foods, heavy protein, fat diets (it just requires too much from the body). Digestion requires alot of energy from the body, especially eating a processed diet.
Anyway I hope this helps. Know that things get better. I had one person telling me that when I was going through the roughest part of all this and thank God for him. So know with time, hard work, determination, it will get better. But please explore all things..don’t accept the “he has to be on this drug and that drug, etc. The body knows how to heal it just has to be allowed to heal!
God bless. Wanda
DEAR TONI,
I COMMEND YOU AND JENNY MCCARTNEY FOR SPEAKING ABOUT YOUR PERSONAL STRUGGLES WITH AN AUTISTIC CHILD. I’M A YOUNG MOTHER OF AN 5 YEAR OLD AUTISTIC, I ALSO HAVE OTHER CHILDREN SO THANKFULLY MY MOM IS THERE TO HELP ME WITH HIM. GOOD LUCK WITH EVERYTHING.
Hi Toni,
I too, have an autistic son. We adopted James at age 2 he is now 10. We too have have to provide services for him and his brother. The most effective therapy we have used is movement therapy. James is a caring bright boy. we both agree that the sensory intergration provided in movement therapy is the reason for their leaps in development. We still have the nuerological storms especially when we travel any distance. Changes are difficult. Our life is rigidly scheduled. We use a picture schedule with interchangeable activities for each day. We have a word for surprise transitions called a zigzag. This lets them know that something stressful is coming up. Every morning we preview the day and each evening we reveiw the day. Life is a challenge but the joys far out weigh the difficulties. God Bless,Diane Carroll
August 2, 2008
Dear Ms. Braxton,
I saw you on Oprah Winfrey last year I just wanted to let you know your not alone.My son is now 6 years old and was diagnosed at the age of 2 1/2 as severe autistic. It have not been an easy journey but by the grace of God I have learned to deal with his disorder. I like many other parents have experienced some of the same things. My son seemed to be normal to me but after his second birthday I started to see changes. The first thing is he stopped talking completely, his eating habits changed and he just slowly started to regress. I did consult with his pediatricain and like I’ve read many other statments was told boys just don’t develop as quickly as girls and was encouraged to wait and see what would happen. I wasn’t satisfied so I continued to seek help from other sources and I just did’t give up without having an answer that pleased. After many Drs. trips and he was diagnosed and shortly after that he began to have seizures. They are now under control due to medications but if he gets really sick there’s always the possibilty of him having one. God have bought us a very long way. I know that there a many years to come and I am praying that God will bless all of us to be the best caregivers that we can be. The most important thing that you can give an autistic child is love and understanding also be the best advocate you can. Always ask questions even if you think it something simple there’s nothing wrong for expecting and answer. I wish you, and your family the very best and may God continue to bless and keep you.
Sincerely,
Cynthia Jones